


The Blue of Castiel's Eyes

by haleynovak



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, M/M, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-14
Updated: 2014-04-14
Packaged: 2018-01-19 09:05:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1463602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haleynovak/pseuds/haleynovak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean looks at a picture of his loved ones and thinks about the good times and the bad times of the past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Blue of Castiel's Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this is my attempt at angst (key word: attempt). Previously posted under the same name on fanfiction.net.

Dean looked at the picture in his left hand. He was in it, but he ignored himself, looking at the others in the photo.

There were Ellen and Jo. Ellen was practically his mother, and Dean always did have a crush on Jo. They treated him like family, and Dean never hesitated to treat them the same way.

There was Bobby, the man who treated him like a son. After his mom died and his dad became a hunter, Bobby had helped him through it. When they were all grown up, Bobby still helped them with hunts. Bobby really was the father Dean never had.

There was Gabriel, who was Dean’s brother-in-law. Gabriel faked his death at the Elysian Fields Hotel. Lucifer had stabbed the double, and Gabriel had escaped. He spent a long time undercover, and when he reunited with Sam, they got together. A while after that, they got married. Gabriel and Dean’s brother had started out enemies, but as time went by, they grew to love each other.

There was Sam, the aforementioned brother. He and Dean had been through thick and thin together. When Sam told Dean he was with Gabriel, Dean almost died. But no matter what, Dean could never not love his baby brother Sammy.

And there was Cas. Castiel, the one who gripped Dean tight and raised him from perdition. Cas was Dean’s best friend, but of course they had their fights. And without one of those fights, they never would have realized that they were both madly in love with one another. They had gotten married not long after that, and Dean was happy that he had finally found the right person (er, angel) for him.

But Ellen and Jo died when they were tracking down Lucifer. After Jo was attacked by a hellhound, she decided to use whatever time she had left to help everyone else. And Ellen couldn’t leave her baby behind. So they all built a bomb, and the two died in the explosion meant to keep the hellhounds at bay.

And Bobby had been shot in the head by Dick Roman. Just as they were escaping, just as they thought they were safe, they noticed the bullet hole in Bobby’s hat. He held on for so long, but it was too late. After he died, he came back as a spirit, but the boys had to stop him when he turned vengeful. They essentially had to kill him for a second time.

Gabriel died a hero. When they found Metatron, Gabriel pulled out his archangel blade and approached. Gabriel had managed to stab Metatron, which would return Heaven to normal, but Metatron managed to drive the blade through his heart. The two had died in an overlap of burnt wings.

Sam went on without Gabriel, but he always seemed distracted. During a case, Sam was holding off a Rugaru that had passed its expiration date. Dean was prepping the homemade flamethrower, but looked up just in time to see the monster take a chunk out of Sam’s neck. Sam bled out, and Dean torched the monster before it could cause any more damage. He watched the flames consume the monster with tears in his eyes.

But the worst was Castiel. After they got married, they couldn’t have been happier. It was only because Dean took his eyes off of Cas for a second that he died. They were fighting an angel, and Dean managed to trap it in holy fire. When Dean turned away from Cas to look at the angel, he heard Castiel gasp. When Dean turned around, there was an angel blade embedded in his chest. Dean saw the second angel that they hadn’t known was there. Taking Cas’s angel blade, he forced it through the angel’s throat, then move to the other to do the same. Dean rushed to Cas’s side, but it was too late. In his final breath, Castiel said, “It wasn’t your fault. I love you, Dean.”

And now Dean was looking at the picture, holding it in his left hand so he could see the gleam of the silver wedding band he still wore. He could feel the tears streaming down his face, but he didn’t care. There was no one to hide his tears from anymore. Dean shifted his gaze from his left hand to his right.

The gun was glinting in the light that streamed into his and Cas’s bedroom. Dean slowly lifted it, examining the engravings. When he looked back at the picture, he raised the gun to the side of his head. “I’m sorry,” he said.

The last thing Dean saw was the blue of Castiel’s eyes.


End file.
